Monday, October 31, 2005

I was in a different world ....

Each day I come in her presence.. makes me feel stronger and feel grateful that I have her blessings.. How impressive is her vision that surrounds me all the time and how forceful Her words are to me… today the evening meditation was marked with a group of people who had gathered to chant her name and among them sitting silently I watched them grow into the astral level devotees from ordinary workmen they were. Along the side of the hall, where I was sitting I can feel their devotion rising and growing envelop of chants that slowly engulfed me too.. and I was transformed into a living consciousness, devoid of any physical sense only the blissful awareness that I am among kali ma’s devotees and slowly an electric spark started growing on the base of my spine… by the time the singers were at the crescendo of the chants I was already floating among them.. with the sounds, the chants and Her benign presence.

Am I already changed...?

The next day I was so enthused with her visions to me that I sat down besides the holy Ganges flowing nearfby and just watched the river flow quietly to the Sea. The people thronging the ghat, the children jumping in the rier from the pier and from the Tea Stall the fresh brewed tea scent hanging in the air, made the sun look brighter. The boatmen with their cries to grab the attention of the pilgrims going to the Belur Math set up by Swami Vivekananda made me feel fresh. Yesterdays whole night was spent in my thoughs of the experienced that had me uplifted me to a level where things seems to loose its form … its was kind of a feeling of being formless in a mass of energy light and happiness. It was very hard to break up from that feeling of being in the One.

Sitting in the room of Sh Ramakrishna Paramhansa, I thought of the things that have had come to pass… thought of the things that I am going through.. what is this change that is happening..? Will it ever change me….? Or Am I already changed?

Om Namah Shivaya

No longer me

The sound keep melting in me
The sound of silence
The sound of conch
The sound of circulating group of devotees
Till it was no longer me

I swirled within the circle
Floated in the group
Went high
and then merged
in the overall consciousness of me
In the Universe

She took me in her arms
and went away to the stars
A long silver thread followed
From the manifestations
Of God
Which was lying down in the group
Of Singers singing your songs

I woke up in the dew
That was hanging at the grass blade
Till sun trampled on it
With his harsh rays
And I woke in your love
Lying still among the chants.

Om Namah Shivaya

Friday, October 21, 2005

Deeply in Love....

Some thoughts are knocking in my head
I feel restless
And fatigued
Are you calling me from far?

Do you want me to come?
Sit besides you
And Hold your hand?
Or are you going away?

I am already far
Far from you
How further you can leave me

It’s just that thought
That keeps coming back to me
Again and again
That is keeping you besides me

Or is it that you have already left?
Why then this emptiness
That engulfs my soul
Is not at all empty of you

Do you want me to come back?
And hold you close to me again
Or do you want me to go away
And hold nothing against you

Then what is this my love
That keeps coming back to in thoughts
Scratch my world of emptiness
And draw out some bloodless soul

I am just deeply devoted to you.

Om Namah Shivaya

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Kali Ma why I have Doubts .....?

The bank of the holy river Ganga calls me every time I close my eyes in Meditation. I get transported to the Ghat where I have spent many hours in solitude among devotees thronging the very powerful idol of Kali ma. Dakshineshwar temple situated at the Ganga ghat in the far corner of Kolkata has been a place of spiritual upliftment for since the time my younger brother lead me to it. I find my self happy at the thought of being there again among the powerful presence of the spirits of great souls like Ramakrishna Paramhansa, Vivekanada and many such saints of Hindu religious sects. I feel, in my heart, a desire to reach out to the Kali Ma and ask her to give me something each time I stand in her presence at the prayer hall within my thoughts. But what do I ask her? I fear asking her something so small that the rare chance of asking her something for me fritters away.

I am happy in any case being given the chance to be with her at the mere thought of her divine grace and what more one can ask apart from the bliss that even her thought gives.. I have the grace of her so great that just by thinking about her gives me her presence so what more I can ask? But then I have this nagging fear that I may be going in wrong direction .. Am I Kali Ma? Why not you give me the direction to go, why not let me have the path which reaches you easily. Will I get that this time… ? But then I again I am filled with doubts what if you test me, give me another path that leads me into the forest of desires and fulfilling my Karma again. What if the path that I am going on is the right path as you have pointed me towards it years back? But Kali Ma, I also a child, asking from his mother, how to come to you.

Will you give me a circuitous path leading me away to began with or this time Ma, I will reach out to you?

How far one can go into the forest of senses? Don’t you think Ma that I am already half way through in the forest? Now will each step I take, lead me out of the forest …? Ma I need your divine help and your finger to hold and walk out of your Maya with you and me within you…Jai Durga Ma

Om Namah Shivaya

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Kailash Mansarovar ... A place I love to be next year...

Kailash is a rather small member of the Himalayas. They are the youngest of the earth's visible mountains, growing at the rate of several centimeters every year, as India, the sub-continent and former island moves inexorably inland. The name of this stupendous range stems from Himavat, the father of Lord Shiva's bride, Parvati. The Himalayas or abodes of snow are considered the mystical dwellings of Gods from ancient times. Ancient texts such as the Ramayana, the Mahabharata, the Puranas and the Vedas, all sing in unison of the glory and wonder of the Himalayas. The Ramayana says, "There is no mountain like Himachal, for in it are Kailash and Mansarovar. As the dew is dried up by the morning sun, so are the sins of mankind by the sight of Himachal."


Hindu mythology recognises
Mt. Kailash as the only abode of the gods that can be visited by man in his mortal body. It is the earthly manifestation of Mt. Meru, the great mountain at the centre of the universe around which the whole creation revolves. While Brahma resides in Brahma Lok and Vishnu in Vaikunth, Shiva resides on Mount Kailash in a state of perpetual meditation, generating the spiritual force that sustains the cosmos. According to the Ram Charitra Manas, it was here that Shiva related the story of Ramayana to Parvati. Mount Kailash is also the residence of Kubera, God of Wealth. It is believed that Ganesha and Karthikeya both came into being on the Mandhata Mountain here. The offspring of Shiva and Parvati, along with other saintly and accomplished beings, able to grant the wishes of those living below, reside in these supreme mountains.

Om Namah Shivaya

Sunday, October 16, 2005

To Sherry who wanted to know about OM ..

Here is some thoughts that came to my mind once you messaged me Sherry about OM...

Om is ..

The sound that Love sings
The Sound of pain that lover’s presence relieves

It’s with me,
Within me –
Om is Om

Om is the light
Om is the sound of silence
Om is my love
Om is the flame
That burns in between my eyes

The Three lines on shiva linga
The force that flows in the Ganga
The figure of Lord Ganesha

Is what OM means
To me

Om Namah Shivaya


Description of Om...

Some Details of Om

Found first in the Vedic scriptures of Hinduism, Aum has been seen as the first manifestation of the unmanifest Brahman (the single Divine Ground of Hinduism) that resulted in the phenomenal universe. Essentially, all the cosmos stems from the vibration of the sound 'Aum' in Hindu cosmology. Indeed, so sacred is it that it is prefixed and suffixed to all Hindu mantras and incantations. It is undoubtedly the most representative symbol of Hinduism.

Use of this sound in rituals, may have originally started by imitating a similar territorial call of the male tiger.

The OM symbol's left part, which is like a figure 3, is also a component of some Devanagari letters, where it means "this syllable has no initial consonant".

Philosophy of AUM

Gods and Goddesses are sometimes referred to as Aumkar, which means Form of Aum, thus implying that they are limitless, the vibrational whole of the cosmos. Ek Onkar, meaning 'one god' is a central tenet of Sikh religious philosophy. In Hindu metaphysics, it is proposed that the manifested cosmos (from Brahman) has name and form (nama-rupa), and that the closest approximation to the name and form of the universe is Aum, since all existence is fundamentally composed of vibration. This is considered by some to be remniscent of some current physical theories such as quantum physics and super string theory, which describe the universe in terms of vibrating fields or strings.

It is frequently used to represent three subsumed into one, a common theme in Hinduism. It implies that our current existence is mithya, or 'slightly lesser reality,' that in order to know the full truth we must comprehend beyond the body and intellect and intuit the true nature of infinity, of a Divine Ground that is immanent but also transcends all duality, being and non-being, that cannot be described in words. Within this metaphysical symbolism, the three are represented by the lower curve, upper curve and tail of the ॐ subsumed into the ultimate One, represented by the little crescent moon-shape and dot, known as chandrabindu. Essentially, upon moksha, mukti, samadhi, nirvana, liberation, etc. one is able not only to see or know existence for what it is, but to become it. In attaining truth one simply realizes fundamental unity; it is not the joining together of a prior manifold splitting. When one gains true knowledge, there is no split between knower and known: one becomes knowledge/consciousness itself. In essence, Aum is the signifier of the ultimate truth that all is one.

Examples of Three into One:

* Creation (Brahma)- Preservation (Vishnu)- Destruction (Shiva) into Brahman

* Waking- Dreaming- Dreamless Sleep into Turiya (transcendental fourth state of consciousness)

* Rajas (activity, heat, fire)- Tamas (dullness, ignorance, darkness)- Sattva (purity, light, serenity/shanti) into Brahman

* Body, Speech and Mind into Oneness

* Etc.

Om Can be Seen as Ganesha...

The Chandogya Upanishad (1.1.1-10) states, "The udgitha is the best of all essences, the highest, deserving the highest place, the eighth."

"Aum" can be seen as Sri Ganesh, whose figure is often represented in the shape of Aum. He is thus known as Aumkar (Shape of Aum). Sri Nataraja, or the Hindu god 'Shiva' dancing his dance of destruction, is seen in that popular representation mirroring the image of Aum. It is said to be the most perfect 'approximation' of the cosmic existence within time and space, and therefore the sound closest to Truth.

"The First Word Om (Aum) It is also called Pranav because its sound emanates from the Prana (vital vibration), which feels the Universe. The scripture says "Aum Iti Ek Akşara Brahman" (Aum that one syllable is Brahman).

When you pronounce AUM: A - emerges from the throat, originating in the region of the navel U - rolls over the tongue M - ends on the lips A - waking, U - dreaming, M - sleeping It is the sum and substance of all the words that can emanate from the human throat. It is the primordial fundamental sound symbolic of the Universal Absolute."


For me Om is the Sign of three lines on the Shiva Linga too.. For me Om is the Live breathing that I take with in me in and out..

For me Om is a Source of all my Bliss...

Om Namah Shivaya


Tuesday, October 11, 2005

TORTURE GARDEN.. What to think... ?

Oki I am hereby reproducing the message sent by a great person Kemi.. I am glad that she got me to read the works of Mr. Octave Mir beau who wrote Torture Garden in 1899. (You can read some quotes of his book here.. I am going to read the book looks interesting but here is what she quoted and I have replied to her my first thoughts..

Tell me what you guys think….
The Torture Garden (Octave Mir beau)


"You're obliged to pretend respect for people and institutions you think absurd. You live attached in a cowardly fashion to moral and social conventions you despise, condemn and know lack all foundation. It is that permament contradiction between your ideas and desires and all dead formalities and vain pretenses of your civilization, which make you sad, troubled and unbalanced. In that intolerable conflict you lose all joy of life and all feeling of personality, because at every moment they suppress and restrain and check the free play of your powers. That's the poisoned and mortal wound of the civilized world."


In My opinion

Octave Mir beau was a person who has his own opinions and who was TALKING about the world that he saw.. which is not real... Its as per Hindu religious outlook is all but MAYA (An Illusion) - Rmember Matrix? but more importantly as per his character Clara, she was looking for the physical pleasure and which has its own limitation.. you can only go so much further with giving pleasures to ones five senses.. which in time gets immune to those particular pleasures and looks forward to new things all the time.. that is why the degeneration ofn society happens..
But on the other side if you try to make your self.. your own soul happy then you hit bliss of the attachment of the all prevading superconsciousness and you attan\in never ending happiness not of your senses but of your soul... which is definately more constant....

When the author talks about anything .. he basically talks about things in relations to the material body which dies.. so you see one has to look beyond the body that dies.. and feel oneself more closely to the one that lives in the body i.e. the soul who does the thinking who does the being ... I hope I am making some sense... hehehehe

Om Namah Shivaya

Thursday, October 06, 2005

How can I save your drop of love.....

The water moves in graceful flow
Along with devotions of thousands of men
Carrying with it flood of sins
Seasons and torrential rain

From the top of mountains
To the limitless sea
I could touch
The underlying fact
In the cold wetness of
Holy river

That people change

Sitting on the banks of Ganges
The sun that was setting
In the orange gloom
as the evening slipped
In the night of thoughts

And I thought of you

How one saves a drop of water
From ever drying up
How I can save the trace of love
That I found in you
From Drying up

And the river told me the eternal truth
The only way one drop can be saved
Is to take it to the sea
Will you give me that one bit of love
You have
I will merge it with in me

Om Namah Shivaya

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

The flow of Holy ganges stir thoughts beyond the realm of human experiences...

The River that has the imagination of a country like India in its spiritual grip. The river that attracts worlds largest human gathering (30Million people,

the river that flows across the heart land of India, the River whose water never gets stagnant or stale even if you keep it for years together... that river has always stirred my feelings like a living image of Krishna or Shiva. Whenever I come across River Ganges on my various tours on work or on my meditation trips... I feel that I have just walked into presence of Lord Shiva whose abode the river comes down from and who has borne Her in His jata...

Many devotees in their old age live by Ganges in Kasi so that they die in her presence and attain nirvana...

This time I came across the river while on the way to meet few of my relatives on the way to Moradabad in Uttar Pradesh. I was passing through the Garhmukteshwar when I crossed the bridge in the evening.. On the bank there was a gathering setting up the Aarti of Ganga ma and I get off my car to go there. The sun was setting down and the orange glow was every where.. when I touched the river and sprinkled the water on head to purify myself as is the Hindu custom I felt refreshed. The river was in its full flow.. and the main stream was full of vigor and energy. Looking at it, I got transported to another plane of thought where the flow is like an energy stream that rises up from the bottom of spine to the top of head as Kundalini rises to reach the crown Chakra. The way any energy finds its way to the action, the way each river reaches its destination in the sea that each one of us understands, but the ways of Ganges is beyond ones grasp if one looks at the sheer devotion that it carries with it. The river becomes at each passing ghat more powerful with love it receives from her devotees. The same thing I find whenever I am in her presence. The beauty of her flow, the power of her each drop the power that she radiates is something to be seen to be believed.

After some time sitting by her banks, I found immense peace within and then slowly the Aarti started and after a long thoughtful mediation, I reluctantly left for my way back to Delhi.

Har Har Gange

Om Namah Shivaya